Assumptions limit us. Assumptions prevent deeper understanding. Assumptions set boundaries. Assumptions are not facts. When you are in conflict, the first step is to identify the assumptions. Write them down, say them out loud, and think about them. Look at them from every angle, and for now, consider that they are all wrong. Then, start asking questions of the other person, and learn MORE. Assumptions get in the way of actively listening to what the other person is saying. W

You do it all the time. That doesn’t sound great, does it? When we hear ‘you’ as the first word, we anticipate what follows will be a complaint or accusation. Our assumption prevents us from hearing anything else. Instead start with ‘I’ and describe how you feel, what you may need, or what is important to you. Review these examples: Original version: You are very late. Better version: I was worried when you weren’t here. Original version: You left out a lot of important infor